Posted by: sulya | 9 October 2009

Get Out of Your Own Damn Way & Say Thank You

So, yesterday.  Amongst other things.

I accidentally stabbed myself with a safety pin.  Thing dug straight into me about a half an inch.  I think I’ll get to keep the hand but it was disturbing to see a safety pin all curvy and straight and embedded in my palm.

It snowed.  The boy wandered around the house in the  morning gleefully exclaiming, “I love snow, it’s my favourite season!”  I replied, “That’s good baby, I’m glad you’re happy.”

I got a flat tire a day after getting my snow tires put on.

My friend, who was looking after the boy and her own two children ALL DAY along with her husband , then sent her husband to help me put on my spare and they watched the boy even longer while I went to get the tire fixed and remounted.  When I called to say that I was going to be a little while longer they had ordered Thai that they expected me to share with them and that all was totally fine.  They even took my son to a movie today…

Later, another friend of mine read me TWO chapters from a lovely book that she’s been reading to me and let me babble about some things I’ve been working through – mulling on – cogitating…

And I felt like a burden.  And I felt like a babbling, boring lunatic woman.

And then I realized that I was getting things I would – and do – easily, happily, give.  I remembered that things rarely come from the direction you think they will come from, nor do they show up in exactly the way, or time frame, you might have expected.

I realized that though it is hard on the boy to miss time with his dad when he travels and that it’s hard to teach small children all day and then come home to no help and a small child – it’s also REALLY nice not to have to miss three solid days with my son.

I realized I am getting a lot of the things I need.

I realized that I need to get out of my own damn way to accept them.  Own them.

Cherish and welcome them.

And then remember to say thank you.

And mean it.

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Responses

  1. Sulya, a couple of days ago I stabbed myself to the bone with monster rose thorn. It was like a shark tooth sticking out of my finger and I guess I didnt get the entire thing out. I could barely bend my finger the next day.

    What a lovely way to spend time with a friend, reading chapters to each other. People just sitting around spending that much time with each other is a bit rare these days. Everyone seems to be in a rush about nothing.

  2. Good Grief Kitty! That’s one serious thorn… Makes me think that the rose it was protecting must have been the most beautiful rose in the world… Very sorry to hear that you don’t think you got it all out – hope it has not gotten infected.

    Yeah – I love reading aloud and I very much enjoy being read to. Probably love reading aloud more, though… Raging narcissist that I am (smile)…


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